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Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Raising Boys - 24 key points to ponder

This has been circulating on the web for quite some time now, and the original author has managed to get lost in the mix. If you know who the orig. author is, please let me know so I can add it to my post & give proper credit (it says anonymous, but I think I saw a name at one point in time)!

Raising Boys - 24 key points to ponder




a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!

b) For those who already have children past this age, this is
hilarious.

c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.

d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.

e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas...

Things I've learned from my Boy's (honest and not kidding):

1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq.ft. house
4
inches deep.

2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
Roller
blades, they can ignite.

3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
restaurant.

4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman

cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a
paint can, to spread paint on all Four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.

5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few
times
before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit
by a
ceiling fan.

7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already
too
late.

8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.

10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year
old
Boy.

11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12.) Super glue is forever.

13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
can't
walk on water.

14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials
show
they do.

16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not
like
ovens.

20.) The fire department in La Mesa, CA has a 5-minute response time.

21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
dizzy.

22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
fluid.

25.) Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or
without kids.

A modern parent will show this to their kids and say :

DON'T DO IT!!!

5 comments:

Nichole "Nikki" Warren said...

That's funny!

Michelle said...

Oh my word!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JLB said...

HAHAHAHA!! LMAO! That's great!!! Are you sure it's only boys??

I have one to add...cell phones do not flush well...and they don't ring underwater.

Michaela Dunn Leeper said...

Nor do cell phones work after being doused in a cup holder from a nalgene of water.

Nicole said...

Uh-oh! I'm in for it in a few years. Gulp!